| Marketed as a Christmas rom-com, the Netflix movie Champagne Problems is a bland romantic drama set during the Christmas holidays but with a plot that could (and arguably should) take place any other time of the year. It takes so many things that romances love: vague business executives, wine, Paris, and… sons who don’t connect with their fathers? It’s hard to tell if it’s trying to be different but falls into formulaic traps, or if it’s trying to be formulaic and accidentally includes non-cliché elements. | | 2025
Directed by: Mark Steven Johnson
Screenplay by: Mark Steven Johnson
Starring: Minka Kelly, Tom Wozniczka
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Sydney (Minka Kelly) is an “executive” (For whatever reason, romance writers are really bad with professions and like vague business terms) – she probably works for an investment firm, but her firm is even more vague than her job. Regardless, they want to buy a champagne company so she’s off to Paris to make her pitch.
When she arrives in Paris, she immediately meets a charming stranger and instantly falls in love. And yes you can assume that that relationship is about to get more complicated. Her love interest is Henri, son of Hugo, the owner of the champagne company who claims he’s trying to sell it, but in reality he’s really just looking for an investor. This confusion is courtesy of writers who have no clue how business works or what the difference even is.
But wait, it gets even worse. Hugo has decided he doesn’t want buyers to pitch him, he wants to set up a weekend-long retreat competition to see who is worthy of buying his company. It’s possible there is supposed to be comedy in this section, but the supporting characters are so broadly written, it’s hard to find them amusing, there’s also a nagging suspicion that the film is taking all of this seriously.
Sydney’s competitors are all extreme, one-note characters. Roberto (the only one who elevates the film) is rich party animal; Brigitte is an ultra-competitive French snob; and Otto is a German oddball who has no friends because he has no clue how social or even professional interactions work. If these are the best buyers/investors he can find, then Hugo is just as bad at business as the film’s writers are. Unsurprising non-spoiler: he’s in massive debt.
The middle part of the film is typically wear the lead couple start gradually falling in love. But as already has been noted, they very quickly fell in love in the opening scene. So, then what else can the film do to take up its time? Apparently start examining Henri and Hugo’s father-son relationship, how it got estranged and how to repair it. For a movie that is supposed to be a romantic comedy, there sure is a lot of dramatic sojourns that just seem out of place.
At times, Champagne Problems seems like it’s trying to make something different with its dramatic themes, but then either accidentally or on-purpose, just incorporates formulaic traps instead to show off just how poorly written this movie is. It’s not Christmas-y, it’s not particularly romantic, it’s decidedly not funny, it’s basically nothing at all.
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